October 28, 2011

Radiator wars...

The weather began turning cooler about two weeks ago, with highs in the 60s and lows in the 50s, which just happens to be my favorite temperature range.  In fact, I remember sitting by my open window, sipping some luke-warm tea, feeling the cool breeze on my face and saying, "Ah, it's so nice not having swamp ass 24/7."

In North Carolina, this is when the temperature would shoot back up into the 80s and I would walk outside in my leather jacket and ankle boots and immediately begin to evaporate.  But apparently things aren't happening that way here in New York this year.  Tomorrow there is a winter weather advisor.  As in snow.  Snow!  In October!  Before Halloween!  This is bonkers!  When I said I was excited about the cooler weather finally dropping in, this is not what I meant!

And to officially mark my first changing-of-the-seasons in New York City, our heat came on yesterday!  Now, if you are like me you'll be asking yourself right now, "What do you mean it 'came on'?  Can't you just turn it on yourself?  It's called a thermostat!"  As it turns out, apartment buildings here use steam radiators to heat rooms, which don't work at all until the boiler is turned on in the basement.  Why is this good?  Because it means your heat is free!  Woo!  Why is this bad?  Because you're relying on the building owner or super to turn your heat on.  My NYC friends keep telling me horror stories of their supers "forgetting" about the heat for days.  Which means there is a good chance I might die in my sleep this year.

What I wasn't expecting is that my radiator, which is at the foot of my bed, would be hissing and clanking in my general direction all night.  It sounded like there was a ceramic gnome bouncing around in there trying to escape.  Being in my sleep-depriving state, I grabbed the nearest thing to my bed, which happened to be a strappy stiletto.  I proceeded to beat the shit out of my radiator with a shoe.  It did not help the situation, but it resulted in this gruesome scene:

This is when I realized I was sweating profusely.  My room felt like a rainforest.  I quickly Googled 'how to turn off a radiator' found out that my shiny metal heat box is missing its all-import valve knob thingy.  Of course!  But I was able to turn the valve without the handle, and burned my poor fingers in the process.  RADIATOR TIP:  Use your missing-mate socks and/or torn tights in an oven-mitt manner to turn the steam valve.  Success!

This sock lives there now.  He will protect my fingers all winter.  Thanks bud!

On the upside of things, I'm finally able to throw on my winter coats and elbow-length gloves!  They will be debuted in a few Mon Vogue posts soon.  Hopefully...



  1. That's too funny. I love the 'gruesome' scene. I found you on 20sb (thanks for adding me btw). I had never heard about the radiator thing before. Fascinating! (Korea was the first time I got to experience pipes in the floor to heat my apt.) I look forward to reading more of your blog!

  2. Pipes in the floor?? So, like, the floor is heated?? NO MORE COLD FEET?!?! I'm moving to Korea.

  3. it's nice article and thanks share with us
    we manufactures Steam Radiators

  4. yep the floor is heated...and yes warm feet makes it the best ever!! Also no static so my hair stays pretty calm too. (The pipes are warmed by a gas box-thing for each apartment, which also means perpetually hot water.) ^.^


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